EFCS Home > Family Life > Building Family Strengths: Research to Application > Building Family Strengths: The 10 Family Strengths

Building Family Strengths:
The 10 Family Strengths

** You need the free Adobe Reader to view the sample lessons and the order form.

Format

Each of the Family Strengths provides knowledge and skills to strengthen individuals and families across the lifecycle. The ten Family Strengths are individually and collectively important and interrelated. The following Family Strengths: Communication, Contentment, History, Humor, Resiliency, Self-esteem, Unity and Values are designed utilizing a lesson plan format. Because of the personal and diverse nature of Optimism and Spirituality, the lesson plan format is not used. Instead, a variety of information is provided for exploration individually and within the family unit.

Communication - view the sample lesson

Strong families communicate easily and well - frequently, openly, clearly and directly. They do a good deal of sharing of themselves - their feelings, hopes, dreams, fears, joys, sorrows, experiences, growth, and needs. Perhaps the most important communication skill is listening. Active listening is essential to effective family communication and is vital to hearing and being heard in the family unit.

Contentment

Strong families base their life style on what they can afford and can reasonably enjoy - on a concept of stewardship that stresses gratitude for what they have, not whining after what they do not have. Contentment is the state of being happy enough with what one has or is, not desiring something more or different. Contented families are steadfast and do not allow others to define for them what they have to be and have as a family.

History - view the sample lesson

Strong families have a need for connection to the past - they have a history and are affected by that history. Family history provides roots - a sense of belonging. Family history can be promoted by telling favorite family stories; teaching important events/activities to family members; keeping up with family members when they move away; going to family gatherings; communicating through letters, emails, video tapes, audio tapes etc.; making sure children know their family members; keeping family traditions alive; and remembering special family vacations or outings.

Humor

Families who have joy in their lives are more likely to feel good about themselves. It also seems fairly obvious that having a sense of humor helps families cope with life’s stressors and crises. Humor can ultimately be used as a coping tool for families. Humor is very beneficial in strengthening families. It gives families perspective and sense of power. Humor also dispels anger and aggression and relieves tension among family members. Families that learn to find humor even in some of the grim realities and emotion-packed challenges of daily life have an edge on peace of mind. Changes in this mind set take practice.

Resiliency - view the sample lesson

Family resiliency is the family’s ability to cultivate strengths to positively meet the challenges of life. Strong families help children learn resilient behavior when they teach problem-solving skills and provide non-critical support and sense of togetherness. The values and skills learned at home give individuals the power to shape their lives. Families that learn how to cope with challenges and meet individual needs are more resilient to stress and crisis. Strong families solve problems with cooperation, creative brainstorming, and openness to others.

Self-esteem - view the sample lesson

High self-esteem, feeling good about oneself, makes it easier to meet the challenges of life. Families that believe in their ability to succeed are most often able to carry it out. Good self-esteem provides the basis for a strong family unit. Families that encourage and foster high self-esteem are able to accept some failure as normal and not let it keep them from trying again; able to cope with the day to day challenges or problems that come their way; and able to look toward their future with excitement and confidence while working toward fulfilling their goals. Families with high self-esteem are not likely to let others make their decisions for them or to influence them to do things they do not want to do.

Unity

Strong families recognize that there are benefits and pleasures to be gained from sharing time and activities together. They also realize that they have contributions to make to the family and its members and some obligation to do so. They value the family bond that makes efforts to preserve time together for family activities and interaction. Family unity encourages families to create daily routines as well as special traditions and celebrations, which affirm members, connect them to family roots, and add creativity and fun to ordinary events.

Values - view the sample lesson

Values are a reflection of who we are, our culture and our own unique heritage. Being clear about our values enables and empowers us to establish priorities and make decisions that we can live with and by. What we learn from our families in childhood serves us throughout our lives. Families guide personal growth and education, while offering love and protection. When families are strong, our neighborhood is strong, and our nation is strong, and we can be more hopeful about the future. Values have an influence at every stage of making a choice. Values shape what we perceive. They influence our goals, the alternatives we select, and the ranking of these alternatives.

Optimism

Strong families change their focus from what they have not done to what they can do; from what they do not have to what they do have; from where they have not been to where they can go; and from their weaknesses to their strengths. Optimism, or positive thinking, can help families feel hopeful during times of negative situations. They tell themselves “I can” rather than “I cannot.” They see the glass as “half full” rather than “half empty.”

Spirituality

Families with a sense of spirituality carry a gratitude and sense of hope that recognizes even the little things of life as special events. However, spirituality of America’s families has diverse meaning, extended beyond as well as among family members. The spirit that transcends “self” is seen in many forms. Spirituality provides a way to deal with successes and also failures, especially in family relationships.

Note: Because of the personal and diverse nature of Optimism and Spirituality, the format of information for this strength is not prepared in a lesson format. But rather, it is designed to assist individuals and families in exploring their own spirituality. This section is also the same for all age groups (preschool, elementary, middle/junior high, senior high and adults). The purpose is for caring adults to be involved in sharing the information with the younger age groups.

Building Family Strengths - A Developmentally Appropriate Curriculum

Within the family unit, it is important to acknowledge and recognize all family members. The Building Family Strengths curriculum is designed to include the following age groups. Each age group includes educational information with activities/handouts to actively engage participants in experiential learning opportunities. In addition, the Adult module has overhead transparencies to assist the instructor in presenting the lesson. These tools can be very helpful in train-the-trainer as well.

For more information on the 10 Family Strengths, contact Deborah Thomason.