Unity

“We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.”

--Virginia Satir

Family unity encourages families to create daily routines, as well as special traditions and celebrations which affirm members, connect them to family roots, and add creativity and fun to ordinary events. Families can build a secure nest in many ways. The nest must shelter without smothering and allow room for all members to “test their wings” under protection and encouragement.

Key Points

Strong families recognize that there are benefits and pleasures to be gained from time and activities together. They also realize that they have contributions to make to the family and its members and some obligation to do so. They value the family bond and make efforts to preserve time together for family activities and interaction.

Families that value unity will, from time-to-time, evaluate the time and energy allocated to family, and when necessary, make needed adjustments.

By spending pleasant, positive time together, families build up a reserve of good feelings. When trouble comes, it has to be shared with the family and resolved.

What families do together does not matter so much as that they do something together that is mutually planned and enjoyable. As a general principle, it is probably a good idea to strive for a balanced activity program, including active and inactive, physical and mental, old and new, at home and away, work and play. Spontaneity, humor, wit, and fun are goals to strive for.

Family unity includes time that family members spend together, both quality and quantity. It means maintaining family identity and togetherness, balancing family priorities with support for member needs, producing strong family bonds, and freedom for individual self-expression.